I started my Christmas shopping tonight.  I have a Wii.

ummmmm....  well unless you believe in the big bang and evolution.....then techincally Adam & Eve are the originals!

Since when did Adam and Eve originate in Australia ?  If they were early Aussie, could they be Bruce and Cheryl ?

import... technically, so are the aboriginals.  Why does everyone forget this ?  OK OK, so they came over a long long time before we did.  But at what era do you have to enter a country to be truly of the country ?

There are no native humans on our continent, simply some that have been here longer than others.

[1. Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse"?]

Wow, I am very impressed with some of those answers.  I thought they would be a little more tricky than that, but a few of you do have the lingo down pat.

Responses to the questions have been mixed and even the aussies I have discussed this with have mixed comments on the answers, so there is no right or wrong.  The final answer, or deciding factor on the citizenship test is simply: Who was game enough to have a go ?

Looks like I might have to throw a few swags down in the home paddock and fire the billy up !  Big piss up in the pergola tonight !

2007 Australian Citizenship test
 
 
1. Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse"? Simply means something gave up working. And I can't explain the origin although I could hypothesize for hours.
2. What is a bloody little beauty?? Incidently, in this scenario, beauty is usually pronounced 'bewdy' and means anything that makes you happy. A sheila giving you a coldy could be referred to as 'You Bloody Little Bewdy', her hubby giving you a coldy would be  'you Bloody bewdy' without the 'little'.  A car that makes it up a sand dune without bogging down while the 4WD's founder, would be referred to by everyone as 'a Bloody Little Bewdy'.  A really nasty black eye might be referred to as 'that's a bloody bewdy'!
3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey? They are only related in the sense that you are doing (chucking) something. Having a sick day, throwing a wobbly (temper tantrum), doing a U turn.
4. Explain the following passage: "In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo." In the afternoon last Christmas the relatives came around for a barbeque, drinks and sausages. After some painkillers (Bex is a brand of painkiller popular 20+ years ago) and a sleep we opened the presents, ate all the chocolate, biscuits and lollies (candy). Then we drank some beer and Mum got angry because Steve and Dad had an argument and started punching each other.
5. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash? Three silly names are driving to Surfers Paradise in an car that used to be a big hit with the teenagers about 20 years back.  They are travelling at 100km/h (60m/h for the Americans here) listening to Jimmy Barnes, John Farnham and AC/DC. How many cartons of beer will each person on average consume between mooning and having to do a wee? Who cares ?? I want to know how long it takes these guys to wrap their ancient vehicle around a tree ?
6. Complete the following sentences:
a) "If the van's rockin' don't bother ? knockin'
b) You're going home in the back of a ? Divvy Van (police car) This answer varies depending on the situation and local dialect.
c) Fair crack of the ? Whip
7. I've had a gutful and I can't be fagged. Discuss I am fed up (I have had enough) and can't be bothered. (real food does not have to be involved here)
8. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie? Wedgie = to pull someones underpants up from behind, thereby creating discomfort between the cheeks.  (Did you like that gentile description?) No one would have dared try that on me! Although I may have been guilty of instigating a wedgie fight amongst others during the odd drunken revelry...
9. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard "up on blocks"? Is his name Bruce and does he have a wife called Cheryl? Ozzie chavs, council suburb, you guys have got the meaning.
10. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming? Ewwwww...  Never heard of such a thing, nor did the aussies I discussed this with.  However, none of them were named Bruce or Cheryl...
11. What are the ingredients in a rissole? With extensive discussion here, it was decided as long as mince meat (ground beef), onion and an egg make it into the mix, the extra additives are simply posh garnish.
12. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam. Sorry, no vid here, however, popular opinion has it that you nibble opposite diagonal corners off, then dip one of the nibbled corners into your coffee and suck the coffee up through the other corner, like a straw. A suggestion was made to make sure your TimTams were stored in the freezer first.
13. Do you have an Aunty Irene who smokes 30 cigarettes a day and sounds like a bloke? No.
14. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been flogged from a bath full of ice? I can't stand three bean salad, is the chop Pork or Lamb and is the Pavlova home made today and crispy, have fresh cream and fruit on it or is it a soggy store bought one with tinned muck on top?  I don't drink beer, however, I might have fished a can of UDL out of a bath at some stage, rarely someone elses though unless it was offered.
15. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own? Tricky question.  If you bought chicken, scotch fillet and real kangaroo sausages, and enough for everyone, you can expect to be invited again next time.  If you bought Woolies snags (cheap supermarket sausages), helped yourself to the good stuff without it being offered by the supplier of said good stuff, and got caught, expect a lot of chuntering gossip behind your back.  Generally, if the supplier of the good stuff gets first pick, everyone is happy.
16. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter "b" is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot? Beetroot.  This varies state to state.  As does having your hamburger cut in half without being given the option. ewww...
17. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots? No, yes, yes, yes.  Who could live without thongs and an esky ??
18. Is it possible to "prang a car" while doing "circle work"? Is it possible to have an auto accident while playing silly buggers and doing 360's? Of course.  Depending on the situation, you could be a hero or an idiot for it. IE, how close did this happen to Bruce and Cheryl's place ?
19. Who would you like to crack on to? A lady does not discuss such things !
20. Who is the most Australian: Kevin "Bloody" Wilson, John "True Blue" Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie? This question really ceated some discussion and the answer is not cut and dried.  Suffice to say Kylie Minogue is considered a defector and wasn't in the running.
21. Is there someone you are only mates with because they own a trailer or have a pool? A new sticker has hit the road here.  It is used predominately on the back of Utes (utility vehicle). It says... 'No, you are not my mate'. 
22. What does   " sinkin  '  piss at a mates joint and getten para  " mean? Drinking alcohol to the point of being unable to walk.  (Paraletic)

Of course, all of my 'answers' above are open to discussion.

ET and tundrah, very well done. 

*blushes* @ 19

Bad news
Had that foot/ankle seen to yet ? What is the outcome ?

Any pics available of the way they should be wrapped ?

OK, so I don't need to set up a bed in the spare room for you guys.

Seriously, did you understand any ? Some ? A few ? Couple ?

2007 Australian Citizenship test
 
 
1. Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse"?
2. What is a bloody little beauty??
3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey?
4. Explain the following passage: "In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo."
5. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?
6. Complete the following sentences:
a) "If the van's rockin' don't bother ?
b) You're going home in the back of a ?
c) Fair crack of the ?
7. I've had a gutful and I can't be fagged. Discuss
8. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie?
9. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard "up on blocks"? Is his name Bruce and does he have a wife called Cheryl?
10. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming?
11. What are the ingredients in a rissole?
12. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.
13. Do you have an Aunty Irene who smokes 30 cigarettes a day and sounds like a bloke?
14. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been flogged from a bath full of ice?
15. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own?
16. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter "b" is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot?
17. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots?
18. Is it possible to "prang a car" while doing "circle work"?
19. Who would you like to crack on to?
20. Who is the most Australian: Kevin "Bloody" Wilson, John "True Blue" Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie?
21. Is there someone you are only mates with because they own a trailer or have a pool?
22. What does   " sinkin  '  piss at a mates joint and getten para  " mean?



OK !  Not counting the aussies here, who else thinks they can answer the questions above ?

Xarnutechno Soncitwist ?

We have back flips, front flips... We know what they look like on bocks, but what about a techno twist, what would that look like ?

And no, my pages are just fine.

What does a techno twist look like on bocks ?

Upwings are new, not proven or fully tested within the bocking community and availability is sketchy.  Even Upwing resellers don't seem to have stock yet.  It seems the only ones out there are a pair here and there, possibly prototypes or pre releases.  Videos you see of them are predominately advertising vids by the manufacturers to tell you how wonderful they are.

I understand if and when you do manage to find any in the US, they are illegal imports due to patent laws.

No one can give you a comparison recommendation based on performance over a period of time.  If you find a pair, buy them at your own risk.  (And make sure you give us a performance report )

Anyone care to correct me on the above ?

hahahaha i feel sorry for my neighbour though whos mam is alergic to fur so he aint allowed a pet.

Thren a snake would be perfect for him

oh So sad you lost her and that happened.  This is one of my greatest fears.

Blind Betty is a little favourite of mine.  I could rave on about her for hours.  However, I will try and keep it short for the non interested parties.

Betty is a Maccie, Antaresia Maculosa.  She is blind, however, her species is not supposed to be.  Her blindness was caused by an incubation error. 
She is smaller than the average maccie and is currently around 3 foot.  This is a particularly small size for her age and I put this down to the fact that she is constantly moving around.  Unlike a normal snake that will sit and do nothing, Betty is always moving, sniffing, and 'looking' around.  I personally think this is because she doesn't get the visual stimulation that normal snakes get, therefore she uses all her food energy on moving and hasn't grown as large as she should have.
Betty loves playing with 'toys' and I will often put empty coke bottles, paper rolls and snake fun things in her tank for her to investigate and crawl over, under, around.  Sighted snakes will usually ignore something if there isn't food or a dark place to hide involved.  So Betty is quite the unusual character.
Her lack of sight and size hasn't stopped her breeding though and a couple of years back she presented me with 7 perfect little eggs and a short time later, 7 perfect little heads popped out of the eggs.  I still have three of her kids at home with me, Macca Jnr (after Dad), Fraggle and Psycho.
Betty's blindness makes her a little different to the average snake. Living in a world of black means she doesn't have to head for a dark spot to hide away and she is happy to curl up on my monitor and keep me company at work.  She has no fear of predators or 'big things', likely because all her life she has never seen anything scary or had need to be.
Yeah, ok, I sook on about her don't I ??  I will stop now. :p

Wheeeeeeeeeeee!!  A snake topic, I am here !!

Yeah, I have a few of the more common Australian species and a couple of Arafurae.

You will find a few arafurae pics on www.arafurae.net

Snakes rock!



And here is a pic of Blind Betty pretending she is keeping an eye on me at work.

You will have to come back and visit family again then, and look us all up when you get here.